


can't part the sea

by serpentineshadows



Series: in a world, on your own [2]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Almost Drowning, Gen, Roronoa Zoro-centric, Zoro with a Devil Fruit, partly angst, partly lighthearted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-28
Updated: 2019-06-28
Packaged: 2020-05-28 09:01:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19390849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serpentineshadows/pseuds/serpentineshadows
Summary: Zoro deals with having a Devil Fruit. His crew mates notice. (Set after "abstracted" & "a matter of perspective" takes place during this.)





	can't part the sea

**Author's Note:**

> this was long overdue lol. unfortunately, physics is soul-crushing and not conducive to writing. bc the other 2 parts were lighthearted, here is the obligatory angst zoro experiences over having a devil fruit
> 
> warning for: almost drowning, zoro beats himself up over not being able to not drown
> 
> note: events in "a matter of perspective" take place during this so the very last part might not make sense (if you don't feel like reading it/are too unfamiliar w/ bnha to read it, just look at the end note)

Despite the love cook and Nami’s protests to the contrary, Zoro decides that the worst part about being a Devil Fruit user is that water is _everywhere_. 

(“You don’t even _know_ what your power is! How are you not more worried about that?” Nami argues, sometimes, until her voice is hoarse. “It could be a liability during a fight.” Usually, that’s when the conversation ends because, loathe as Zoro is to admit it, she’s right. Being useless or, worse, being a hindrance during a fight is…well, Zoro doesn’t like to think about that. A problem to deal with later.) 

They’re pirates. They live their lives on the sea, so they can be weakened, countered, by any ship that comes along and decides to drown them. Of course, this fact doesn’t quite hit Zoro until Luffy falls overboard one day while fishing with Usopp and Chopper, Zoro jumping after his captain as he usually does.

 _Ridiculous_ , he used to think when Chopper or Brook accidentally launched themselves after Luffy. They can’t swim, and they knew Zoro would save Luffy, so why would they bother? It’s only after his first time nearly drowning that he really gets it. He jumped after Luffy on instinct, muscle memory dictating that he chase after the straw hat disappearing into the ocean’s depths without a moment to even think about what he’s doing.

It’s the first time that the ocean has felt _forbidding._ Oh, he’s dived after Luffy when the waters were freezing and unpleasant, but he’s never felt anything quite like this. This helplessness, the sluggishness settling into his body even though there’s no reason for it to. Knowing that his captain’s drowning and he can’t even muster up the strength to save Luffy even though he’s right there? He has frustration, anger, the desire to split the ocean in half to reach Luffy, but none of the ability to actually do so. (But he _has_ felt this before, he realizes, even though he doesn’t want to acknowledge it. Kuina…the unfairness of it all, the inability to do anything.) The difference here is, Zoro’s not alone.

There are hands grabbing at him, dragging him up towards sunlight. It helps, just barely, with the panic bubbling up in his chest, threatening to be released in the form of a silent scream, a plea for help that the merciless sea won’t answer but his crew will.

The next thing Zoro knows, he’s spluttering on the deck, Franky leaning over him. “You okay, Zoro-bro?” he asks as Nami starts lecturing both Luffy and Zoro on their carelessness, Zoro especially.

“Thanks, I’m fine,” he grunts, which Franky seems to accept (for now).

Zoro endures Nami’s lecture and finally lets it sink in what being a Devil Fruit user really means. _Weak_ , subject to the whims of the ocean and sea stone, in exchange for a power that might not even be worth it.

Less than half an hour later, Zoro experiences his second taste of his reality as a Devil Fruit user. The showers and baths, which he never had a problem with before even as a new Devil Fruit user, are now impossibly daunting. Before, settling into the water meant a bone-deep weariness pressing down on him. Which was _fine_ because as long as he got it, that weariness was gone.

Now, though, even touching the water reminds Zoro of his helplessness, his _weakness_. He watches Luffy sink into the water, not quite happily, but without care. Confident, despite the fact that he’s surrounded by his mortal enemy. Content to let the water take hold over him. How has Luffy dealt with this, time and time again? Chopper? Brook? Robin? How does the feeling of hopelessness not wedge itself into their hearts, frightening them away from the simplest of tasks like taking a bath?

“Zoro, aren’t you getting in?” Luffy asks, as innocent as he always is but Zoro gets the feeling that Luffy knows what’s wrong, pretending for Zoro’s sake that nothing is.

“Yeah,” Zoro says and takes the plunge. The bathwater saps at his strength, mental and physical. He mirrors Luffy’s position, staying mostly out of the water.

It’s quiet for a moment, as it often is when Luffy’s bathing, the water consuming all of his energy. Then: “Zoro knows it’s okay he can’t swim anymore, right?” Luffy says softly, as if it’ll lessen the way his words dig at Zoro’s insecurities. “I never knew how to swim!”

“Yeah,” he considers saying, the lie already bitter on the tip of his tongue. But it’s Luffy who’s asking, who understands why Zoro’s struggling, and it’s not like this is a physical injury, something he can sleep off and protect himself against in the future. Instead, Zoro says: “But who’s going to save you all when you fall overboard again?” He’s aiming to sound casual, but he hears the desperation lacing through his tone.

Luffy laughs. “Silly Zoro! Franky and Usopp saved us this time. Sanji and Nami can, if they need to. Jinbe, too, when he joins up with us again! It’s not your purpose in life to rescue our crew’s Devil Fruit users, so it’s okay if you can’t anymore.” His face contorts into what Zoro recognizes is his thinking face. “Maybe don’t jump after us anymore because you’re a Devil Fruit user now, too. Nami gets annoyed about that.”

That’s enough to keep Zoro’s intrusive thoughts at bay for the rest of their bath, and maybe Luffy can sense that because that’s all he has to say on the subject. He switches to wondering about what their dinner will be, a topic Zoro doesn’t have much to contribute to, but it’s fine because he lets Luffy do all the talking.

After the sun has set and they’ve all had dinner, the crew all splits up to do their own thing. That’s when Robin finds Zoro as he’s lifting weights in the crow’s nest.

“You might never get used to it,” is what she chooses to start the conversation with: a wonderful sentiment.

“Gee, thanks,” Zoro grumbles, not bothering to look in her direction or put down his weights.

“But you shouldn’t fool yourself into thinking you’re weak because of it.” At that, Zoro tosses his weights to the ground. Since when did everyone become so perceptive? (Alright, stupid question, considering this is Robin, but still.) “You will not be any less of a swordsman for it.” That cuts straight into the heart of his other issue with being a Devil Fruit user, but Zoro stays silent because he doesn’t know what to say. That she’s wrong? “This is not an issue you can cut, but there are many situations you will not be able to brute force your way out of.” Zoro can feel the pointed look at his ankles, burning into his skin. “Perhaps this is a good opportunity to learn.”

Perhaps, Zoro thinks, as he picks his weights back up again and Robin leaves. Luffy’s and Robin’s words bounce around in his head while he goes through his exercises. He wanted to obtain the title of world’s greatest swordsman through his own merit, as Mihawk did. Would Mihawk look upon him with contempt now that Zoro possesses a Devil Fruit, decide him unworthy because of it? No…but that idea ends up plaguing his dreams for a while. 

After Wano, Nami asks him, “How did you get so lost?” Of course, Zoro responds, as usual, that he _didn’t_ get lost. Nami must be able to smell his uncertainty because she presses until he ends up admitting that he was wandering around a weird school, fighting with this weird brat with explosion powers who insisted they were in some place called “Japan” and had no clue who Kaido and Orochi were. 

“So, how did you get back to Wano?”

“Stepped through a weird glowing thing.” Even if Zoro couldn’t see, he would be able to imagine Nami’s expression: a look of complete judgement, showing how dumb she thinks his past actions were.

“First, why would you do that? Second, how did that weird glowing thing appear?” Nami finally asks, after many deep breaths. When Zoro shrugs, she resorts to taking many more deep breaths.

“Perhaps,” Robin interjects, “it’s related to Zoro’s mysterious Devil Fruit power? Maybe teleportation of some sort?”

“Maybe,” Nami says, Robin’s cool logic calming her. “I guess we can only wait and see if it happens again.”

Robin is very, very smart, Zoro thinks, after the fifth time he lands somewhere weird after walking through the glowing thing (even though he already knew that). None of the places he lands in ever seems to know about the New World or the Emperors or anything that’s common sense in his world, which leads to the suggestion: “traveling to different worlds?” 

They’ve long come to the conclusion that these trips to other lands are a result of his Devil Fruit power; they’re just not quite sure how it all works. And, fine, maybe the love cook and Nami ended up being right because it feels like a weight’s been lifted off his chest now that he has a vague idea of what his power is. A non-combat related power. _Good_. It’s not useful, which serves as a painful reminder that he’s lost something precious in exchange, but it’s not a crutch to him becoming the world’s greatest swordsman.

On long nights where he can’t help but think about his weakness, about his inability to swim, it’s comforting to think that his dream hasn’t been torn from him as well. So, Robin’s right, too, because he never does quite get over not being able to swim, but he no longer worries about being worthy of his goal.

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. if you didn't want to read "a matter of perspective": basically, zoro gets lost, ends up in ua dorms from bnha (during wano), frustrates the life out of bakugou (a student w/ exploding powers), gets lost some more, and stumbles his way back into wano
> 
> 2\. zoro's devil fruit is dimension-traveling. not explicitly stated in the fic bc i don't believe they'd figure it out what it is right away
> 
> 3\. this is unbeta'd...so if you catch any grammar/spelling mistakes, let me know


End file.
